Me M33 had a big fight with girlfriend F29. The fight involves my ex. My girlfriend has been distant. What do I do next.
TL;DR; I had a big fight with my girlfriend relating to my ex wife. I’ve been officially divorced from my ex with for about 2 years now. In the beginning of my relationship my with my girlfriend , my ex wife would show up at our dates , show up at her house , say rude and horrible things to my girlfriend , ect… Eventually this all ended with threat to call police and restraining order. The problem is I have 2 children with my ex wife so I need some contact. I set a boundary with my ex wife to only communicate with me about our kids. My girlfriend wants the boundary even further. My girlfriend doesn’t want me to ever call my ex wife or even receive pictures from her . Which i think might be too far because some things can be communicated easier on the phone , and I would like to have pictures of my kids. That’s another days problem. My ex wife will text me about the kids but then through in other stuff that I deem inappropriate. The other day my ex wife asked me to take the kids . And then went on a whole tangent about the date she’s going on with her boyfriend. I answered ok, but the deleted the message about her boyfriend because I didn’t want to look at it. I also would deleted any messages that that insult me or my girlfriend. I do this because I choose not to respond , but I also know my girlfriend might see and get upset. My girlfriend read messages and realized that I deleted some messages and i came clean and we got in an argument about them. The problem is I lied for about an hour beforehand and destroyed our trust. I know I was wrong , but I’ve been through so much with my ex wife and life in general the past couple years . I just didn’t want to upset my girlfriend, ( and I know she would be ).
Other than ex wife drama , me and my girlfriend never fight . We both got out of horrible relationships and love eachother in a way I didn’t think possible. A day before this fight we were making love, going on walks , laughing with each other , we spend every second with each other and everything seems perfect. She also loves my children. We talked about eventually getting eventually getting married , moving in together , and having kids of our own . I’m not lying when I say we are a perfect match. We even have a matching tattoo , and she tells me she loves me more than anything. I love her sooo much , I don’t want anything to do with my ex , and I generally want her to be happy.
So what now ? It’s been about a day, we didn’t talk yesterday. I called her to say goodnight and she answered . She asked if I was ok. I told her I love her and I’m sorry . She said you’re not sorry and said goodbye without saying she loved me. What do I do today? Do I give her space , call her again? Text her ? She’s off today and we were supposed to hang out. Is this the end? She is an avoidant type of person , I’m just not sure what to do. I don’t want to lose her over something that seems so stupid . My ex would love nothing better than to see me suffer. It would suck to lose a relationship over outside factors … please help.