u/ExcellentSafe2953

When working at a gas station some teen around 17-18 came in loud and obnoxious. They were suspicious as fuck standing by the liquor checking out the alcohol and when they came up to the register they were already making me uncomfortable. Talking about doing drugs, taking liqour shots and getting pussy. Reluctantly I rang up the rude loud teens just to get them the fuck out of the store. As they were leaving the one guy looked back at me and said "Try not to suck too many dicks" and then laughed at me, his friend joining at petty fake laughter as they left. I felt so humiliated and gross, it ruined my day completely. Teens and young men these days are genuinely so mean and gross usually sly comments don't get to me but this sexual one just made me feel violated, the way he said it and looked back at me gave me a icky feeling. Maybe im exaggerating and just emotional/sensitive from starting hormones but i feel genuinely sexually harrased. I told my dad, not what they said specifically but just that someone made a sexual comment about me and made me uncomfortable. In my own self pity boohoo I said it was my fault for choosing to be like this (a trans woman.) He just said yep and that was the end of the conversation. I feel like I'm at a crossroads of choosing to be a woman but having to deal with sexual comments and queerphobia or boymoding and suppressing my true self. I don't want to be deadname, I don't want to be a man, but I don't know if I'm cut out to be a woman. I don't know if I can handle the hatred and creeps that will come from it.