u/Evil_SmartFalco

No thank you~☆

Falco hops in the practice room, dancing with measured steps to the music when suddenly...

Poof

She disappeared into thin air

Meanwhile at The World's End Tavern, Masked Fools Headquarters

Poof

Zhongshan: Hello thanks for coming today Miss Falcon, once again, I am Doctor Zhongshan, I will be in charge of our random checkup today.

Falco: Who in the Laughter are you? I've never met you!?

Zhongshan: Ah, yes. As I said, this is a random checkup isn't it? Come to think of it... This is exactly how Sparxie reacted when I performed this little trick on her the very first time...

Zhongshan scribbled on a notepad.

Falco: I'm not dealing with this, I'm going~☆

As Falco stood up, leaving she is suddenly thrown back by an invisible force, landing on the stool as it spun around in circles and stopping in front of Zhongshan.

Zhongshan: Respect the bit would you? It's not everyday an NPC like me gets any screen time.

Falco: What?

Zhongshan: Say ah...

Without delay, Zhongshan opened Falco's mouth, sticking a popsicle stick in it as she moved it around randomly, making curious noises.

Zhongshan: I see... I have enough information for the diagnosis now...

Falco: That's it~☆? What kind of doctor are you to make such a rushed diagnosis~☆?

Zhongshan: A bad one, I surely don't have a license.

Zhongshan: I diagnose you with something quite serious Miss Falcon.

Falco: It's Falco~☆

Zhongshan: ... Falcon.

Zhongshan: You seem to suffer from a memetic virus I am dubbing: The Umadol Virus, it's quite a serious disease.

Zhongshan: Patients experience a speaking issue where their speech is often ended with a cutesy flair like this~☆ Often getting the tendency to perform in live concerts and to "be the best Umadol in the world"

Falco: And?

Zhongshan: Oh you thought there was more? That's really all there is to it. If you want it cured, you can contact me to book another session, no promises that I can cure you of course.

Zhongshan stood up, walking out the door as she continued.

Zhongshan: Now if you don't mind me, I have a game of Celestial Jades to get to.

Falco: What the heck was that...?

Poof

Falco appeared back in the dance studio, falling to the ground as the chair did not follow her.

Falco: Ouch~☆!

One moment I'm playing the most average, boring ass career runs possible

The next I'm getting a god run as if the three goddesses just bestowed upon me the greatest gift possible to man

Then comes the next day

I GET THREE ATTEMPTS IN A ROW WHERE I SPEND ALL MY CLOCKS TRYING TO BEAT GOLSHI OR SOMETHING IN A MILE RACE WITH KING HALO (with A on Mile)

Then the game has the audacity to give me a good run with incredible item rolls.

AND GIVE ME SO MUCH I AM CONSTANTLY BROKE

Then it stops doing that

AND STARTS THE LOSING SPREE ALL OVER AGAIN

Tomorrow, I bet it would either be hell like today, or just a boring loop

I love and hate this game so much at the same time, I'm sure we all agree

Anyway I'm done venting my anger

In case you're wondering, no I didn't finish any of those runs giving me a horrible time

I'm using Falco because it makes sense she would say this, and I just so happen to be on this account as I am trying to write it 👍👍👍