Should I reach out to my sister?
My sister's birthday was a week ago and I did not call her. I have spent the last three years coming to terms with the fact my mother was emotionally abusive towards me during my childhood, and often recruited my sister to engage in said abuse. Now I don't blame my sister. She was much less the target of my mother's foul moods (mom's favourite), but not totally immune to them. Also she was doing what kid's do, modelling her behaviour after the adults around her, chiefly our mother. The issue is, around two years ago, I wrote to her, after confronting my parents, and she wrote back with the advice I to not let mom get to me. I brought up things like how my mother used to accuse me of anorexia if I didn't like the food she cooked, how she yelled at me ina department store once, because I didn't like the dress she chose for me, and all the times when I was a young kid they ganged up on me for trivial reasons, despite the fact it was two against one, and I'm the youngest. I wasn't expecting an apology, again, she was just a kid, but I would like some acknowledgement. I got nothing. She didn't write back, never called. I would eventually see her when I went to visit my parents last summer, and nothing. To be fair, I didn't bring it up, and I could have, but I'm just not motivated to. It's been a fraught couple of years, and I'm still coming to terms with stuff, still navigating my new relationship with my parents, while also married and raising kids. My relationship with my sister is just not a priority, and I don't need the stress. And if I'm totally honest, I suspect my sister will deny I was abused. I base this on very little, maybe I'm just being paranoid. Anyways, am I wrong to just not having my sister in my life ATM. It's not like we refuse to talk to one another, but neither of us is making an effort, or talk unless it's something my Dad has put together, like a family zoom call.