I had a good day going into a family gathering and showed up really excited and in a good mood but when I got there things didn’t really go the way I expected.
When I first got there I was so excited to see everyone , I greeted each person and then after some time, I guess things took a turn.
At first my cousin criticized my recent car purchase (especially the 9% interest rate) and said I was taken advantage of. I tried explaining my situation (credit score, no down payment, trade-in context), but it felt very condescending in front of others.
I struggled to engage in conversations. People were often on their phones or in smaller groups, and when I tried to join in, responses felt short or attention shifted away. Even when talking with my mom, she got pulled into other conversations and I felt ignored.
I left early feeling invisible and pretty emotional afterward, and started questioning whether it’s even worth going to these events if I don’t feel included.
Now I’m trying to figure out if this is just a normal family dynamic I should accept, or if I should step back. I also feel like I may be pulling away as a defense mechanism because it feels easier than repeatedly feeling dismissed. Emotionally, it’s starting to feel like it’s mostly just me dealing with things on my own.
For dinner instead of being there I’m eating some leftover pizza and a Manzanita Sol.