My mom had this mug custom printed for me, saying it made her laugh out loud.. obviously she thinks it will make me laugh too but it actually made me cry. It’s true, there is nothing I can do about having her as my mother. Healing from her “mothering” has been gut wrenching at times and she has NO idea the brokenness I have felt because of her. The YEARS of therapy, struggling with OCD, lack of personal identity, floundering through young adulthood, abusive relationships I’ve gravitated towards because they felt comforting.. I feel as though she shaped me into a monster, subsequently blamed and shamed me for it.. and when I started to emotionally mature, I had to start re-mothering myself in order to be a normal, functioning human. I am hyper aware of my behaviors and actions and I desperately want to be a nurturing, balanced, and kind mother to my daughter. It breaks my heart that this acknowledgment of our relationship kind of turns all of the pain and hardship I faced and the work I’ve put into healing, into a joke.