My husband and I have been together for 15 years and we have two children. We both worked throughout the marriage, so it was never a situation where only one person carried everything financially.
For a long time, he could raise his voice at me, control me, and even tell me what I was or wasn’t allowed to buy. I tried to tolerate it and explain it to myself, but over time it got worse. During arguments he can insult me, swear at me, and bring up old things from the past again and again. Many of our conflicts turn into scandals instead of normal conversations.
For the last year, I have not wanted intimacy with him at all. We have not had sex for about a year because I simply do not want him anymore. I feel like something inside me has completely switched off.
Six months ago, I left with the children and rented an apartment. We have been living separately since then. The strange thing is that I do not miss him. I feel calmer without him. He keeps calling and begging me to come back. He says he has changed and that he understands everything now, but when we talk, I still see the same aggression in him. It does not feel like it has really gone away.
Part of me feels sorry for him because 15 years is a long time, and we have children together. But another part of me feels like I already left emotionally a long time ago.
What would you do in this situation? Is it worth trying again for the family, or is the fact that I do not miss him and do not want him anymore already the answer?