Obligatory breakfast, not dinner.
We were high school sweethearts who reconnected after college. But in the relationship she was avoidant and had pretty unfair expecations (I always had to support, but could never expect hers). In her apology she said she strung me along bc she was scared to lose the love I gave her, and that she didn't understand the difference between seeing someone who deserved love and actually loving them (ouch).
She also had a verrry toxic codependent relationship with her agoraphobic mom which affected us. She said she went no contact with her and that allegedly it made her realize her past relationships were toxic and that's what prompted the apology.
Coincidentally, she broke up with me 5 months after my oldest brother died and 3 weeks after my dad died. All that together just destroyed me, I was the lowest I'd ever been. Still some feelings due to that proximity, but years of therapy later and I'm not sure what more can be done about it.
I feel like I should appreciate this apology but I'm more annoyed than anything. Life has moved on. Friends, job, family are all doing great, my girlfriend and I just celebrated 6 years together, we're just about to spend our birthdays abroad, and now the ex comes in poking at old wounds in a way that feels like she wants me to validate she's a good person or something.
I have a response typed out but kinda think sending it is a bad idea. As much as I want to tell her off for this, a reply feels like it would be more for her than me.