It's never as straight forward as it should be.
It should be simple, set boundaries and move on.
My boundaries where weak, I have not moved on. I know i should, this woman has nothing of value to offer. We've had an on again, off again situation ship together ever since i found out about the cheating. She generates problems between herself and our daughter for me to solve. It keeps me drawn in and feeling responsible. A couple weeks ago she did something that triggered me. (I made plans to take our daughter out, unbeknownst to me my ex took it as a moment to go out on a date. She comes home dressed up, perfumed and wearing what used to be her/our old D/S collar. *we live apart but i was putting my daughter to bed at her place). Set me back to day one, opened all the old feelings of betrayal and hurt. I process my feelings for a day, then we sit down and talk things out. I wept like a baby. Process for a few more days and talk things out again.
After roughly 5 years she still makes promises that she's changed, preaching stuff like "I've done the work". Promised she's not the same woman. Tells me she loves me. Reminds me of how great our chemistry was.... My daughter has an ipad, everything is linked. So i have a look. And what do you know, she's got a 600 day snap streak with some friend zoned fella a couple hours away. I look a little closer, she's perusing a romantic relationship with this guy she just went out with. All the while pleading with me to go to couples counselling with her. I cant even say i was surprised by what i saw while snooping. I already know what kind of a woman she is.
I thought i was a level headed person, smart enough to know better. How many times do i have to let this woman teach me that she's a deceitful shitty person. She caused emotional, trauma and damage that apparently I haven't properly addressed. My Dr got me a referral to speak to a psychologist at the end of the month. I spoke to my brother, he helped me write out some what should have been obvious boundaries. It's high time I finish separating our lives.