My MIL is insane and does nothing but lie
I (23 female) have been in a relationship with Rock (Nickname 24 male) for 3 years. We met online 4 years ago and aren't married due to finances, but are hoping to get that ball rolling this year.
I have to start this by giving context into what our relationship looks like. I bought a house at 18 to escape my family situation. I lived alone for nearly 3 years. 1 of those years Rock and I were dating long distance as he's from another state about 1200 miles away.
My relationship with MIL was great in the beginning before we got together, as Rock and I had been friends a year prior to us getting together. A few short months before we got together I got into a car accident that landed me in the hospital for a month with a shattered pelvis. She would talk to me on the phone during that time and was overall worried about how her son's friend was doing.
This is where it all began. Within the first 6 months of our relationship I could tell she was not happy about us getting together at all. Rock even admitted this to me. We both agreed that it would pass and she was just being over protective because at the end of the day even if we had met in person, I was still a stranger from the internet her son was dating.
The winter after we had reached 1 year together, I was faced with let's say some challenges. Within one week I had been fired from one of my jobs over text (during this time i had 1 main 40 hour a week job, a 20 hour a week side job, and any side hussle i could find for the weekend), sued for nearly $100,000 by the hospital I stayed at after my car accident, my house pipes busted due to the cold winter we were having, and my good childhood friend passed away due to a brain aneurism at 25.
Up until then I had never asked Rock for a dime. He bought me gifts and such for my birthday, anniversary, valentines day etc. But never just gave me money for a bill or anything as I was and still am very independent. I work in the culinary field, and if you know anything about that, winter is not a good time for finding a job in that field. So I was in the weeds at this point. Rock couldn't handle seeing me struggle like this so within the month it took me to find another main job he had payed my house payment and payed for my pipes to be fixed so I could have water again without being asked. I even refused at one point but he sent me the money anyway.
This set my MIL off. Because Rock gave me money she took that as, oh so he's handing out money now? Then Rock can pay $700 a month in rent as he was living with his mom at the time. She also demanded him to show her his savings account periodically or be kicked out. This is also the first time she officially started making up stories about me. To her now I was a gold digger simply using Rock for his money. Keep in mind he made no more money than I did, we were on a completely even playing field.
Finally 2 years in, Rock and I had decided we should think about moving in together. We tossed around what state we should move to, mine or his, but ultimately decided he would move to me, due to a couple of factors such as I owned a house already, and my state offers more college opportunities for the medical field he wanted to be in. Also jobs as his state is not a great job state.
His mother was ecstatic. Even helped him load his Uhaul and went on a rant about how good this was for him to be getting out like that, overall being a supportive mother.
Rock moved in, we got him a job in his field, and we were trying to settle into a routine but unfortunately as luck would have it, life has a funny way of grabbing me by the tits and shaking me for my lunch money.
Rock's car broke down within the first few months of him arriving here. He has a older manual from the 90s that his father and him restored before he moved here. Unfortunately the one thing they did not fix broke. So now Rock was driving my car to get to work, I happen to live only a couple of minutes from my job so a coworker who also lived just a couple of minutes away would pick me up and take me home if I didn't choose to walk. Thankfully Rock only works Monday through Thursday so I could have my car for my housekeeping job I had on Sundays.
Well this didn't last long due to the fact the job I had been working at over a year turned out to be ran by a cult. I won't get into to much detail on this as this is a post about my MIL but needless to say, I had to leave and it was a rough situation.
Rock then started having problems at his job due to a coworker lying constantly about him to the bosses, on top of the not having his car, me not having my car, the cult situation, only surviving on one income plus what ever I made housekeeping on Sundays, and me starting to have health problems that had me in and out of the doctors once a week, led to a LOT of fighting on our end.
This lead to Rock venting to his mother as they would have their weekly phone calls. I didn't think much of this, in my eyes they had a pretty normal relationship, and if I had the chance I'd vent to my mom too.
About 10 months after Rock moved here his entire family visited for a few days. This includes MIL, Rocks step father, and his two sisters. They were here not only to see us but also celebrate his sister's 21st birthday.
As far as I was concerned everybody had a great time. Minus one incident. We went to a very large mall in my state as his family had never been to a mall like that before due to his state not having any. As we were entering the main mall area out of one of the big department stores the escalators were broken. I have a big fear of escalators as it is, I was absolutely terrified to walk down a broken one even of it is just "stairs." It took my brain a moment to process what I was doing so I stopped at the top for a second to get my bearings. That's what Rock decided to tell me to go by pushing me. I gasped pretty loudly and caught myself with the railings and turned around and asked him why the fuck he would do that.
This led to bickering and slight raising of voices. Nothing crazy, no crazy mall fight or anything, just a couple bickering like someone hid the TV remote you know?
MIL took it upon herself to grab me and link our arms together and proceeded to walk me around the mall like I was a child. She started trying to talk to me about Rock and I's relationship, how i needed to give him grace for you know, trying to push me down the broken escalator. I was mortified. I just agreed with what ever she said and wanted to get it over with. I thought it was definitely odd but still she hadn't showed many signs of being a demon yet and up to that point we had a fine relationship. We'd talk about crafting and mutual hobbies here and there. Talked on call about every month or so. It was cordial at least.
The weekend keeps moving as it was, and a few hours before they were on their way to the airport we stopped at a waffle house at the request of his step father. It was his family's first time at a waffle house.
Dinner was great, everybody had a good time, I was taking pictures of all them together. We get outside and she wanted one final picture of the kids. Logan motioned for me to come by his side for the picture and before I could his mom who was right beside me said, "No just my kids." In the rudest dilvery imaginable. I chalked it up as she just wanted her blood kids in a picture together nothing more and i never mentioned this happened to Rock, though it did kind of sting a bit.
This happened in August 2025. Now just a couple of months ago February into March is when shit really hit the fan. Rock and I had a busted pipe during a cold snap where the entire month of February was below the negatives. This obviously lead to us having no water, but we made due by filling water at work and Rock could shower at his job, me at a friend's. We could not fix the pipes at this point because spending $400 to fix the pipe just to have it burst again in the negative weather would be pointless and a waste of money. His mother of course knew all this information, that did not stop her Facebook post. She told her entire Facebook friends list that Rock and I were poor and couldn't afford to have the water turned back on and couldn't afford to eat. This sent me over the edge. Im not one to care what people think of me as long as it has some fact to back it up. His entire family now had this crazy idea that we were so poor we had no water or food. Don't ask me where she got the idea we had no food from cause I don't know. She literally made that up in her head and posted it for the entirety of Facebook to see. I suggested to Rock that maybe he shouldn't tell his mother anything anymore, or at least nothing that had to do with me. He wasn't happy with this idea. He didn't understand that I said just to not mention everything about our lives to her, not completely cut her off because that's not my place. We had an argument about it but ultimately he agreed to just not mention anything im doing to her. She did eventually take the Facebook post down after Rock asked her. I thought this was over, but no, it had only just begun.
Rock and I were at a hockey game when his grandmother texted him about a care package she was sending. In this message she said she was sending things for him and then added there's also something in there for 'her'. Referring to me not as my name but as nothing more than her.
Rock immediately realized this was his mother's doing. She had finally said enough bad about me that his grandmother couldn't refer to me by my name. So Rock called his mother on the car ride home to finally pit some boundaries on his relationship. I forgot to mention that at this point i knew she had said she didn't want us together anymore and we needed to break up but I did not know how far that went.
The phone call started with Rock telling she is to longer talk about our relationship anymore. It's gotten to the point where it's affecting others in the family views on me and she needed to stay out of anything that had to do with us.
Rock's mother was screaming on the phone. What was she screaming you may ask? She was screaming to break up with me she just kept repeating "THEN LEAVE HER ROCK. THEN LEAVE HER." Once again, refusing to use my name. She promptly hung up the phone. Rock and I continued our drive home while she blew up his phone with text messages. One particular message said "I hope you are miserable because (my name) is an awful person." At least she used my name for that one.
Obviously I was taken aback. I'd never seen her like this before and I didn't understand but I was about to find out.
Rock sat me down the next day and explained everything. Apparently this all started after their trip here in August MIL said they didn't enjoy the trip at all. Accused me of being toxic and degrading Rock. So MIL's genuis plan was to secretly move Rock out without anyone telling me. It started with Rock's magic the gathering card collection he left back in his home state do to it being over three Christmas tree sized boxes big. MIL offered to sell them to a place in his home town. For not even half the collection Rock for over 2 grand for the cards that MIL sent. I thought this mkney was for us to save and buy another car. No. It was for him to get his own apartment. That's what she wanted the money to go to. It did not obviously. She also texted him one morning saying she was going to start checking on him every morning to make sure I didn't "murder" him. That one really caught me off gaurd.
Here is another list of things in short she has said about me or to Rock:
•Told Rock he was dating out of his 'class'
•Called me white trash
•Asked Rock if he had been sleeping at work because she stalked his Snapchat location and didnt understand that location doesn't update unless you open snapchat
•Called Rock 'sickly' looking and accused him of not eating.
•Randomly sent him $30 for no reason during low contact and never said why but im sure you can guess
•Told Rock we were poor, broke, and starving and that he needed to get out of here.
•Acused Rock of being my caregiver because im chronically ill (I dont need help doing anything 🤦♀️)
•Said I was Lazy and refusing to get a full time job and he needed to leave me because of that (This was during the time Rock was driving MY car to get to work because his was broke down.)
You'd think Rock not talking to her would help this as it's been over a month of no contact, and she's called him about once a week crying and apologizing to him. Not to me no, only him. He brushes it off eveeytime telling her she did what she did and this is just how it is now, you know explaining consequences to a 47 year old woman.
And lastly, yesterday, mother's day. I changed my profile picture on Facebook to Rock giving me a piggy back ride. I will say I'm taller than Rock and I got big boobs so I look like an amazon of a woman sometimes next to him.
Rock's grandmother decided she'd comment on my post "Be careful with the back." I lost it. I blocked them both. MIL and Grandmother. I then proceeded to make a post to my snap story (I know immature but I've been so quiet and chill about this whole thing I had to get something out) saying "When you block your shit in-laws and life starts feeling like sunshine and rainbows again". It was honestly cathartic. His littlest sister who is 13 responded to my story saying "You go girl!" And how she was proud of me. That shows you how great of a mother she is.
A few hours later his mom texted Rock saying "Why did (my name) block me?" And he told her it was because of what she's been doing.
Up untill this point MIL had no idea I knew anything about what she had been doing. She was under the impression I still thought she was good and we could continue our little crafting conversations as we had for almost 3 years. No thank you.
In Rock's defense here, he hadn't wanted to tell me what's going on with MIL because he just wanted shit to be normal. He thought if he just ignored it, it'd go away. What a fool I know.
I guess i made this post not only to vent, but also does anybody maybe know a petty way I could get her back that wouldn't be to crazy or should I just keep ignoring it like I have been up untill yesterday? Rock said he's fine with me doing whatever I want within reason to get back at her so it's not going to affect my relationship if I do something. Anyway thanks for reading this mess and if I made anything confusing or you need more context to anything just ask.