Is my manager trying to get rid of me?
Im a new grad in the ICU. I enjoy my patients but I believe my manager is intentionally trying to nitpick and find only the negatives in my performance .
Last week is one example:
Pts are currently stable, so I start to help another nurse with a coding pt.
I go to do my pts BG check and complete orders. Now my pt BG comes back in the 30s. Hgb comes back in the 6 range. I give dextrose. Im told to pull more labs and prepare blood.
Pt has no aline and the tiniest veins. (Even the experienced nurses are missing) so labs are late.
All the electrolytes need to be replaced, type & screen still pending. NG tube placement isnt verified so oral meds cant be given.
I check on my vented patient #2, but 30 mins later, they decide to self- extubate. Im also helping another nurse with a pt who has a HR in the 140s and declining MAP.
The toilet in the pt #1 bathroom starts leaking. I put towels over the puddle near the patients bed and block it off with trash cans. I call the janitor, the technician, and let the charge know. Janitor never comes.
This all goes down within 2 HOURS.
By the time I know it, its shift change. Pt 1 has a BM, I havent been able to clean the room. Im waiting for blood and notice BG dropped again.
Manager is making rounds, they see my room that im still working in and they point out all the things wrong with it. I point to the 4 trash bags I took out at the START of my shift and tell them i have been cleaning since I got here including the previous RNs mess. It doesn’t matter, even when half of the patients are crashing im being reprimanded for not mopping the floors and having it not look good for the patients family that do not exist. Manager was visibly upset, and I explained that I start my shift cleaning up after the previous shift. They didn’t care. In fact they showed more disappointment than when I told them another nurse physically assaulted me on another floor.
I try my best to keep my pts safe in a unit where we lost over 50% of our staff within 4 months (I counted), have no free charge, no CNAs, and often tripled.
I escalate critical results, Im always asking questions, always helping other nurses out, and answering their call lights (which they dont do for me but whatevs). Despite that, my manager was upset that I didnt take out more trash and mop the floor. I ask other people in my cohort if the manager ever comes to talk to them and nitpick. They have never had any meetings about performance.
My feedback during my last orientation shift was that I was “too safe”. Even the VP got involved and gave me another preceptor because they thought that was a lousy excuse to extend me.
I strongly believe the manager just doesnt like me and is trying to find ways to make me uncomfortable.
Please tell me Im overreacting and this is just “how nursing is.” As much as I look forward to staying in the ICU, my unit just makes me feel like they dont want me there.
TLDR: new grad ICU nurse feeling like my performance is under more scrutiny by my manager. Last week patients were crashing and manager came in the middle of the chaos to say I need to clean the floors and be the janitor despite me trying to focus on critical tasks. Other new grads have told me that the manager never has reprimanded them or talked to them about faults. Feeling ostracized because I know I cant be the only new grad that needs correction?