25M I feel I can't connect with people.
Imma try to keep it short, but I'm trying to find my place in this world and I feel I just can't. I go out and meet people and I don't feel I can connect with them.
I mean I go out almost every weekend. I'll talk to people, I may hit it off but outside the event. It feels like they don't really care to communicate. So I feel I'm always initiating and it gets tiring. What's worse is at this moment in my life I'm trying to find that special "Someone" but I feel I just fail every time and wind up moving on.
So much so, I'm starting to feel jaded with people. Like my emotions are disappearing. It sucks because I wasn't always feeling like this. When I was younger, I felt more hopeful and emotional but after dealing with my parents and just so many disappointments. My heart feels hardened. Like I can't really feel things for anyone anymore.
I see other people seem to connect so well with others. But for me it's always hard to make genuine friends. Sometimes I feel there is something wrong with me, but I can't pin point it. Sometimes I just wanna leave my entire social life behind. But then I remember it doesn't solve everything.
I'm putting myself out there, forcing myself honestly. But it's hard. Any advice? I also live outside America.