My (25F) best guy friend (28M) broke up with his S.O and is making me rethink our friendship.
I 25F have been best friends with 28M M for the last three years. We became friends when we were in the same extra curricular club back in Uni. He was already in a long term relationship back then so our friendship was purely platonic and I have never thought of him as any other.
The way I look at M is like an older brother I never had, so if I had any problems or issues, he would always be the one to give me the one stop solution as he was always one step ahead of me (thus already have gone through the struggles I faced). Mostly we would talk about life trajectories, how to figure out values, giving and receiving advice during pivotal moments (of course they will only be considered, not final say) etc.
I always thought that it was weird that M was dating his gf because what he always said he wanted vs what the reality was always different like how he hoped for a career oriented partner but she wasn't, or him giving up studying in the US to be closer to his s.o etc. But I never brought it up to him as it was never my place and was crossing a boundary.
Anyways, recently, he broke off with his gf saying that he had to do something that he had to do a long time ago and told me he is taking some time to process and heal. And all of a sudden I was feeling very confused and weird. Because it felt like I was being broken up with. After I processed that, I somehow felt like I wanted to make this man mine.
I don't know where this is coming from and quite confusing but I came down with the conclusion that perhaps I am interested in him, but never really fully thought about or processed it as he always had a gf through out our friendship, and I was happy with the type of friendship we had. Of course I am not going to come onto him when he is fresh in his pain (at least 3-6 months).
The advice I need is, should I be the one that approaches him first?
I know that he is never one to be the one to move unless he is very sure of the outcome and he is also an overthinker. But if I make the first move and things get awkward and he cuts me off, the cost is way too high.
For those who may want to know why I want to try dating him is, I feel like with him, I can take on the challenges life will give. But the issue is that he may not feel the same way and maybe truly I am just like a younger sister to him who he can guide.
TLDR: Best guy friend broke off with his gf and suddenly feeling weird. Am thinking of asking him out after he heals. Should I, and how?