Sorry for the rant. I have to let it out of my chest
I’ve been feeling down the entire day. The only goal I truly had this CETs season was INTARMED. It still is.
I found out earlier that they distributed the emails. I heard that it may still not be over since others might decline, and there’s also the possibility that they haven’t sent all of the emails for the 100 qualifiers. But still.
I passed the accelerated medicine program of PLM and got my first choice both in UPM and Ateneo. Doon lang naman ako nag-exam. Pero I just feel so stupid kung hindi ako makakapasok sa INTARMED. Sorry if this sounds insensitive—alam ko yung iba pinoproblema pa yung college nila—but everyone around me knows that this is what I really want.
Everyone keeps messaging me, “Nag-email na daw. Kumusta?” I don’t even know how to answer them.
I don’t just feel disappointed—it feels like I’ve lost hope.
Having a nice academic record and coming from a science high school where people expect a lot is difficult. But honestly, I don’t care that much about what others think. All I really want is to get into the program so I can help reduce the financial burden on my mom. She’s a solo parent, and this felt like the one thing I could do to help her. I want her to be able to retire early—yung tipong 50 pa lang siya, may doctor na siya at wala na siyang pinapaaral.
May pag-asa pa ba ako? Tapos na po ba talaga magsend ng emails? Ang sakit na kasi. I did everything. I did my best. Sinubsob ko sarili ko for months. Sumusuko na katawan ko noon, pero yung determination ko, nandun pa rin.