u/EldritchXena — reddlx

This happened a long as fuck time ago so this isn’t a “talk to your partner” situation but some girl friends and I got to talking about sex and I started thinking back on it.

Basically, when I was like 19 or 20, there was a guy I liked from my DnD group and we hit it off. We never officially dated (that was because I was the side piece lollllllllllll) but we would hang out casually and one of these hang outs turned to making out and sex. Or, I guess it was sex? Besties, I tell you I went home wondering if I lost my virginity that night. I did not feel a goddamn thing.

This happened somewhere without a bed and that’s all the detail I’ll provide so I was already kinda generally uncomfortable and it was my first time so I’m sure there was some degree of anxiety that was blocking the signals or something, but the same thing happened the second and last time we tried (I learned I was the side piece here).

Those have been my only encounters and both times I felt NOTHING. This wasn’t fake an orgasm bad, it was I didn’t even know I should be moaning bad. Honestly, should have questioned why he didn’t notice that, but I was young, dumb, and thought I was in love. C’est la vie.

I haven’t had a sexual encounter since (the only person I found worth fucking imo was long distance and he ghosted me eventually) and now I’m 26 and wondering what good sex is supposed to be like, or if I’m just broken or something. I figure it HAS to be better than what I got or people wouldn’t waste their time with it.