I feel bad writing this, but I want an opinion. I have a partner whom I adore. He adores me too — at least, that’s what he tells me. He says he can’t stand my attitude anymore (I’m considered to have a bad temper). I admit I have a strong personality, but very often he assumes bad intentions from me and misunderstands me… On my side, what irritates me about him is his lack of understanding, which sometimes makes me feel like I’m in a relationship with someone intellectually deficient. My goal is not to insult people with disabilities.
That being said, I ask him to flush the toilet. He doesn’t do it because of “ecology,” supposedly. But I appreciate cleanliness, a clean toilet, and not having urine sitting in the bowl when guests show up unexpectedly. I ask him not to leave his dishes on the edge of the sink but to put them in the sink. Apparently, “the sink is for that”! He’s not able to remember such simple requests. Unless he just doesn’t care. I ask him to turn off the light when it’s late and our child is sleeping. Our child has already mentioned that it bothers him. No, the light doesn’t wake up our child every single time, but it’s still a risk. Yet for two months I’ve been repeating this request several times a week, and if I get upset, then I’m the bad one getting angry “for nothing”…
He tells me it didn’t bother our child before. Okay, but it bothers him now! And I find my partner selfish because when he wants to sleep, he loses it if there are too many lights on. So for you, everyone has to be careful, but for others it’s too hard for you to understand?!? I doubt he’s doing it on purpose, but part of me wonders if he is — unless he has some kind of issue. I adore him, but little things like this no longer feel little to me.