I 21M got into a relationship with a friends girlfriend 21F and I feel horrible about it
I know this is a long message but I would greatly appreciate some advice. I 21M got into a relationship with a friends girlfriend 21F and I feel horrible about it she told me many things about him that made me think he was terrible and I don’t even know if they are true but I believed them at the time. I fell in love with her and still feel a lot of love for her she has everything I would want in a girl. Back in January I kind of backed off from her after finding out they weren’t officially broken up and she lied about that. Of course she had a reason for it but I still felt awful. He was a great friend to me but this caused us to drift apart and really our whole friend group to fall apart. About a month ago I noticed on a different friend’s phone what looked like her name with a heart next to it. I knew this other guy had a crush on her as well but she always told me how weird he was and how he made her uncomfortable. I questioned her about it and she said they were just friends and that wasn’t her on his phone and I was crazy. I wasn’t convinced so I started watching their snap scores. They would go up at the same time every time and I asked her about it. She told me they barely talked and he was probably talking to someone else and yet without fail they would always go up at the same time. They were also number one best friends on snap chat. I asked to look at her phone and all of their texts were deleted. Then I asked to look at Snapchat she scrolled very quick through their conversation but I saw a lot of snaps and texts including heart emojis. I said to let me read them and she refused insisting it was still platonic conversation. She became very distant from me not answering my calls saying she was busy or that her mom didn’t want us talking. She said that her mom wouldn’t let her hang out with anyone even her girl friends. Then I drove by her house one day after she wasn’t answering and sure enough that friend’s car was parked outside. I questioned her and she said her mom asked him to come over to help her brother with something. There’s a lot more to it but basically I think she has something going on with this other friend now and I have been extremely depressed about the whole situation. She said she wanted space and that she still loves me and only wants me but I have a hard time believing that. I really was in love with this girl and honestly still am. But now I’m left with no friends no girl and just feeling horrible for what I did to my original friend. I have a hard time picturing myself with any other girl because I loved everything about this one apart from the lying and deceiving. I can’t help but picture her and this other friend being intimate together while I’m alone in my room every night just stuck thinking about the good times and what could’ve been.
TL;DR:I want to hear anyone’s opinions or advice for what I should do. Should I tell the original friend what I did? Should I leave it alone and deal with the pain? How do I get over someone that I still love and still have no closure for whether or not they are just friends or she’s really doing stuff with this other friend now? I honestly just want her to come clean and tell me the truth but she won’t. Let me know your thoughts.