Should I get divorce and what is the smoothest process?
On Mother’s Day, my husband and I got into a huge fight while he was driving. The cause was that he had a doctor’s appointment that required me to be with him. However, after I had already applied for leave for him the first time, he then told me that was the wrong day, so I had to cancel that leave and apply for the correct day. In fact, he didn’t admit he made the mistake and told me I misheard him.
I didn’t want to argue, so I asked him to provide a screenshot of the notification email to ensure I applied for the correct date for the second time. He told me that I would need to be at the clinic the whole morning and couldn’t leave. So I took the morning off to prepare for that, pushed my business trip to later that evening, and rescheduled all my meetings to the afternoon.
However, just the day before his doctor appointment, while we were sitting in a restaurant on Mother’s Day, he suddenly realized that after the procedure he couldn’t drive, which meant we would have to rearrange my kids’ pickup and potentially cancel my client meetings and my flight. I was shocked and angry. He has always been careless and doesn’t consider my work situation, which was hard to cancel client meetings at the last minute.
While we were driving home, he got angry that I told him he should stop being like this. He started to drive crazily in the rain (kept swerving on the highway) and told me in front of our kid that I’m the worst thing that has happened in his life. A few times, I think we almost got into car accidents because there were many cars that day. This is not the first time he has gotten angry like this and repeated that I’m the worst thing that has happened to him, and it made me feel threatened and scared.
The most recent incident, which happened just 3–4 months ago, he pushed me to the ground because one time he left the house without locking the door( btw, he constantly forgot to lock the door so I suggested to install an electric auto lock, but he refused), so I locked it and thought he could just ring the bell and I would open the door for him. Unfortunately, the bell was broken, so it didn’t ring. He had to yell and wait a bit until I heard him and opened the door. He got super mad, told me I’m stupid, that I’m the worst thing that happened to him, and that I bought this stupid house. By the way, I paid the down payment on the house, and my parents paid for the majority of the remodeling fees. He did apologize after this incident and installed the automatic electric lock.
We have a young kid, so I have been hesitant to get a divorce. But my feelings are hurt. There is no financial issue since I have my own job and can support both my kid and myself.