I can be outgoing when needed, but I don't make friends randomly. I tend to focus on individuals rather than groups, and I always worry if I'm bothering them. I've done things like badmouth someone and then comfort them in the same day – just to keep the social peace. I feel genuinely glad when i made others happy. I rarely hate anyone completely, I will somehow find a reason.
I question everything: my own motives, others' motives, even my family's intentions. Sometimes I dissect myself so deeply that I end up seeing myself as just a selfish, instinct-driven, distorted creature. I love philosophy (skepticism, existentialism, phenomenology) and also science, nature, and astronomy. I observe people, animals, and try to form my own logical hypotheses. I'm afraid of being cognitively blind, which is probably why I'm so skeptical. I make small mental plans and prepare myself for the worst, but I'm not extremely disciplined. I oddly love everything and hate everything at the same time..?