I [27M] broke up with my girlfriend [24F] about a month ago. It was pretty messy and sad and caused partially by drama with her mom and partially because we sucked at resolving conflict.
This was our second time breaking up for such reasons. I texted her shortly after as I felt like we had so much to gain if we could just focus on practicing being better partners and resolving conflicts.
Initially she said that she would consider “restarting” if I went to therapy consistently. Later in that conversation, she got cold feet and said “actually I don’t think ur ever gonna change and it’s not gonna work out” and she blocked me.
Since then I’ve been in therapy for 5 weeks and it’s actually helping me in a lot of ways. However I had been giving her updates on Facebook (not knowing I was blocked, thinking she knew I was going to therapy). Later that month, it was our (would-have-been) anniversary and I wrote her a nice letter and made a scrapbook and left it on her car. I didn’t mention in the letter the therapy.
She texted me the next day and said never to come to her place again or she would call the police. I think this response was out of anger and that she was never getting the messages about me going to therapy, so she thinks I am trying to manipulate her back into a relationship without knowing I’m going to therapy… if that makes sense.
All I want is to know her decision based on her knowing that I am following her advice and going to therapy.
Would it be out of line to text her brother and say (distilled) “not trying to harass anybody, would you mind telling GF I’ve been in therapy for 5 weeks?”
Give it to me straight if I’m being delusional.