My husband and I have been married for almost 3 years. Ever since I met him he’s been a very hard working, loyal, religious guy that controls his desires and stays away from any situation that would lead him to cheating, and I want to be very clear about this, he’s the type of guy that could pull out almost any girl he wanted bc he’s handsome, charismatic, knows how to talk to women and everything, but the only reason why he decides to stay loyal is bc he had already lived a crazy party life, different women everyday, strip clubs, casinos, dr*gs, anything that u can image n then he found himself in a dark place spirituall, where none of these things would fulfill him or give him peace until he became a practicing Muslim. Now, im not being naive when it comes to me believing hes being loyal, that I have no doubt in my mind bc he works w guys only, when he’s not at work (n I can see his location all the time btw) hes w me, he doesn’t go out if its not w me…. anyways, he hasn‘t told me all the things he’s done in his life ofc n I wouldnt like to hear it neither but a few times he has shared little stories of that time when he was living la vida loca n lately Ive been thinking a lot about how boring I must be specially for someone that has done all type of crazy things like that, I understand that the variety part I wont be able to compensate bc I’m just one person n not a redhead one day, a blonde girl the other n then the next one a black girl, but when it comes to the things Im able to do n do have control over, I don’t give out the best bjs, I never even did that before him n now we always start w it which I personally don’t have any issues w but Ik I don’t do oral sex like a stripper or a woman w experience that has learned from multiple men what they like n all types of tricks or “techniques“ or whatever it might be that makes their sex something a guy would have insane amount of pleasure n remember it n want to go back to that girl just to get the same attachment n compromise free unforgettable experience. He doesn’t ask for anything specific n bc he works so hard n in general is always tired when he have sex everything is kinda rushed, basic, like he only wants to get his nut fast n that’s it, nothing fancy, we don’t do lots of touching or maybe he doesn’t do much of it but maybe about 4 times in these almost 3 years n there’s no foreplay n tbh Im not complaining about any of that but what I would like is to be able to one day let him relax n then give him the best oral sex of his life or whatever type of sex where I see his toes curling n he just says to me at the end “wow, that was amazing“.
This has been making feel very insecure n maybe sad lately until certain extent bc even tho he never complains I feel like I suck at having sex, my experienc has came from him n he hasn’t taught me nothing