Hi, really need some advice since I am a heavy over-thinker and suck with all of this. Any is appreciated heavily.
Recently met a girl online who lives around an hour from me, we immediately clicked and got along amazingly, sad thing was she was in a relationship. During that phase it turns out her partner was abusive and just using her for money, saw this in screenshots she sent to get advice from me about what to do. I didn’t mean to nor expect to but the more me and her spoke away from that I began to get feelings for her. Stupid of me to do so during her phase of a break up and me being asked for advice but I figured I did like her and could treat her much better. This wasn’t in my head when giving her advice though, wanna be clear on that, never had an intention to give her advice whilst I had feelings.
One night I suddenly built up the confidence and told her to my surprise she said she was building feelings for me too. We had a deep conversation about how we felt and she said she felt ‘selfish’ to do so but would ask me to wait until she healed from that break up and would see where things with me would go, agreeing to a future date and wouldn’t keep me waiting forever.
Since then we’ve added each other on various socials like TikTok, Facebook and Snapchat but this is the part that makes me over think. We mainly message on Snapchat and when I’ve sent her messages there it can go up to an hour or so for a reply from her but if I go somewhere like Facebook I’ll see her online. My head thinks ‘Surely if you are on your phone you would have seen me pop up?’
I thought I ruined things the other day after being short with her once she mentioned she was going for a drive with an old guy friend of hers, didn’t send me a single message for hours. I apologised for it and asked if we were still okay and things had changed. She promised me we hadn’t and we do seem okay now but I can’t shake that feeling that it might have actually ruined it as she did say it ‘rubbed her the wrong way’.
I can’t really address things with her because obviously she is still wanting to heal from her break up and at the end of the day me and her are not together but I guess I’d sorta think we are something if she has admitted feelings for me too and wants me to wait until she is healed up? Even after that incident above she has said things about me which are ‘green flags’ which made me hopeful but I don’t know what to do.
I guess my issue is here is that is this going to actually become something or will I be waiting for nothing? It was all done on the back of a break up which I feel bad for as it is but the previous partner was horrible with her.
I’m due to meet her in a couple of days ‘as friends’ and hang out so I guess I could ask her after that if she actually sees us going further or if we are just staying as friends?
I really need help. Thank you for any. If it’s easier feel free to DM me.