u/Dubious_Ibis

So yeah, friend hang yesterday was really good, if hilarious. Discovering your bestie also has polarising opinions on cutlery is WILD

Honestly really not feeling bad today. I do miss my mum, but at the same time, the person who she was at death looked like my mum, but wasn’t. I know she was suffering, and it was really confronting and sad.

Considering the mental space that I have had this time with the loss of my mum (my dad died in 2018), I think it won’t keep hitting me over and over. Because I don’t need to hold it back, in, or together.

If I’m sad, I can just be sad. I don’t have to prioritise anyone else’s feelings over my own.

For all of the people who miss their mum, for all of the people who don’t miss their mum. And also the ones who just don’t speak to them anymore for their own mental health; I love you, your feelings are so valid and do what you want to do today, especially if you need to hold a separate space for your feelings towards your mum, because you yourself are a mum. It might be difficult, but you can do this.

We’ve all survived 100% of the bad days we have experienced.

If anyone is at an awkward event today with someone who says rude or inappropriate things, some ways to deal with it 💕

I cared for my mum from 2015-2025. She was diagnosed w Parkinson’s in 2015. Now that she’s gone I’m having some feelings about Mother’s Day (which in Australia, is this Sunday)

I loved her, but the way she was from 2020 onwards was progressively not the mum I knew. It became a verbally abusive relationship. In amongst that, I got diagnosed w autism the month before I turned 40. And as I unpack all of the stuff that came up in the last few years, and even from my younger years. I’ve realised that for at least 30 years of my life, I’ve been not myself. I was mirroring people about me, and apparently sometimes when I talked, my mums opinion would fly out of my mouth.

So yeah, my mum isn’t here, and I’m being bombarded by Mother’s Day ads and content. Uber eats suggested I get something for the mum I no longer have this year. And I am so over it and waiting for next Monday at this point.

That being said, my best friend B told me this morning that she is taking me out to breakfast on Saturday, and because I usually bought mum a book, she is going to buy me a book, because it’s important that I feel okay. I love her. In two years we’ll have been friends for 20 years. And now I’m teary eyed again.

Also dinner was a veggie curry with rice and I added some protein. Yes it’s dark, I was eating sitting on a fit-ball on my yoga mat, in the dark so.