What to do
My partner 46yo male and myself 37yo female are unsure re kids. We both always thought we'd want them eventually. I think when I imagine my future I want to have a family but the raising a baby stage does not appeal to me. We are both great with kids but not very settled. My partner worries loads about the future and the state of the world and rise of facism and whether he would even make a good dad. I don't worry about that at all, I just still don't feel ready for all the responsibility. I always thought I would by now and froze my eggs a few years ago. I am sort of ok with the uncertainty, but I want the door to be left open. I think I'm probably leaning towards yes in a few years, if it's even possible. I think my partner can't cope with the uncertainty and the possibility that ill land on yes and he'll be a no.
I wonder am I just not with the right person, if I was with someone who was sure, and excited for thw future whatever it brings, would I be sure I want kids?
I worry that if I don't have them, I'll regret it when it's too late, and that life will be lonely and empty. I hate thinking about being the random aunt at someone else's Christmas table. Myself and my partner both have autistic nieces so that is also a worry.
Is being a parent really the most fulfilling thing ever? Will I be missing out if we don't do it?! Any advice?