My therapist of nearly ten years suggested or asked that we become friends about a year or so ago. I had reached out to her in crises after a breakup and pretty intense traumas. She said she didn’t think she could help me as a therapist anymore but could be we be friends.
I’m a very reclusive person, in that moment I felt excited that she thought so highly of me. Over the span of the year though she’s genuinely only showed up to dump her problems on me and ask me (a very unstable person lol) for advice and philosophical questions.
I’ve been in crisis for such a long time now, my want to seek help is being hindered by having had this very confusing experience as well as fearing what will happen to her if she ends up reported by whomever I pick as my next provider or by staff if i go inpatient.
Am I wrong to feel abandoned and used?