u/DizzyConstant900

She got pregnant back in the end of December and we found out from one of her friends “calling it”. That’s not important but I’m just giving the plot so anyways I used to be a heavy drinker because of my job as a strip club assistant manager. Which I did meet her inside the club and we hit it off immediately. Not an argument not a single problem at all. Long story short I quit my job and moved in with her and I found out she was pregnant a few weeks later. The issue I had was one day I was looking for pictures I took on her iPad of us and came accidentally across videos of her ex and other videos of her with content partners for her Snapchat and onlyfans. Instead of doing the right thing and talking to her about it I held it in and didn’t say anything until 3 weeks ago I got more drunk than I have in a long time and got really mad about it so I went off on her about everything (my insecurities how I think she’s cheating etc.) mind you I have no proof nor when I do think about it all she’s never given me a reason not to trust her. But I just couldn’t get over the fact that she still had those. I brought it up 2 days ago after she was upset and bringing it up again about the things I said.
She went through my phone and said she found old messages about some wild shit I used to do and I didn’t deny it so in her head we both have shit and I shouldn’t have gone off on her.
Now she’s going to school full time so I don’t really see her
I apologize and apologize because I want this to work but she still holds it against me that we got in a car crash that night she blames it on me because I was yelling at her. I was too drunk to remember a lot of that night and I’m saying all of this because I don’t know how long the resentment will last. She’s 18 weeks and I love her with all my heart I just want us to have the same energy we had before and I want to stop feeling so insecure.
She says she wants space but that I can’t give it to her because I am without a car or a place I can go other than where we live when I’m not at work.
What can I do to make her not resent me? Is this just a time thing? What can I do to amend things?