Vanting about a fight that happened between me and my sister
Hi everyone, I hope you're doing well.
This is probably a throwaway account, I'm using it because my main account is kinda known.
So today, me (22F) and my sister (32F) were all good, we texted our usual morning lovie dovie messages while she was at work and everything is fine. This week we were having guests, so today my parents and the guests went out and me and my sister were told to prepare dinner. When we came home from work, we had lunch then I asked her if she could make the dinner because I was extremely tired and a little bit sick ( and so was she ) she said okay I'll make dinner but you prepare the table, salad, and serve dinner later I said yay and thanked her for that and everything was ok, she told me to go to sleep so that I can rest for later. So after I woke up, she suddenly became cold. I tried to joke with her but she was تتشنف I thought maybe she was tired or something so I didn't care a lot. Later on, I went to the kitchen and picked some fruit to eat. She eventually started yelling at me saying that I'm making a mess and making the place dirty ( bear in mind that I'm the cleanest person in my family, and always asks me how am I so clean and organized and that she likes it, and the way i was eating my fruit was very clean I'm sure of this ) anyway I asked her not to yell at me then I just ignored her and left the kitchen. Later on, she asked me to start preparing the table I said I think it's still so early, I saw her starting to get angry so I thought ok let me just prepare it. I went to my room for a second just to shut down my pc and close the window, that's when she started yelling at me I think even neighbors heard her. I got so mad and went to her asking what the f is wrong and why is she yelling ? She said I told you to prepare the table and she started yelling very loud and raising her hands and she was very close to my face, I do not want to believe but it looked so much like she wanted to hit me. I tried to push her back and closed the kitchen door because my parents and the guests were expected to arrive at any moment and I didn't want them to hear her screaming, she went crazy when I closed the door and she almost hit me. I couldn't take it anymore and I started crying hysterically ( I think hormones were doing their job as well bcz I'm on my PMS phase) she said you didn't help me in anything and you left me doing everything alone I told her but that was our deal from the beginning she said no and started screaming again and I just couldn't stop, so I left to another room and was crying that's when she said " unbelievable how some people are experts at playing the role of a victim, you're narcissistic", I went into the room anyway and around 5 mins later my parents and the guests arrived, I felt a bigger urge to cry because now I'll have to wear a fake smile for the rest of the evening just to not let them notice anything + my sister kept teasing me by asking me to leave the kitchen and not help her because " she doesn't need me anymore " and kept doing victim gestures in front of my mother saying things like " I can't take it anymore I'm so tired 🥺" with this exact face.
I really don't know what I'm feeling exactly. I feel super sad because I felt like she disrespected me ( even tho I communicated this with her several times that I feel humiliated when she yells at me or tries to hit me and she promised that she will treat me better ). I feel angry because I didn't do anything that would hurt her. I feel confused because am I really playing the victim role ? And I feel opressed because I couldn't even express my feelings until now.
This post was just to vent, if you have a piece of advice or you can show support then please do.
Thank you for reading all of this.