u/Different-Fill-6891

When losing Ruckus doesn't get any easier. Noticing the absence where me, the pets and even my human baby all expect him to be. Seeing how my human baby looked into the kennel looking for him confused where he is. Seeing Mumbles, one of two cats this one a girl, glance around to check if he's there before she goes somewhere. Max, my female senior dog, barking at people outside then looking for if he comes running like he always did. Me catching myself expecting him to come join me for something around the house like he used to.

I want my puppy back. He was only a year old! It's not fair! But I know that nothing is going to bring him back and it breaks me more everytime.

I have to be seen as strong and hold things together. I have a human baby to care for and other pets, plus balancing a husband who understands I'm grieving but still lashes out when I react due to high emotions.

I'm not doing well with any of this right now. Losing such a great dog hurts more than I thought I was prepared for.

August 12 2024-May 2/3 early morning midnight time 2026.

It feels like it'll never get easier.

We have to wait to see if he'll eat at the vet and recover before we have any chance of bringing him home