u/Designer_Pie_453

Hello. I am 24F and bf is 28M, we currently live together for roughly 2 years now, recently him and his friends took a bachelor trip bc one of his friends was getting married. They went to a strip club, nothing happened specifically w my guy as far as i’m aware but they still tried to hide it and we all found out. To give you some background, this is my first time ever dealing with this in a relationship, i’m happy to hear he just stood there while the other guys went a little crazier, I believe nothing happened, but i still feel irritated knowing he still most likely still enjoyed his time there. I know I sound insecure, I just see it more as a respect thing. I feel like i’m the only person who feels this way. Personally to me, to be in a relationship, if you’re willing to go see a naked girl(s), i might as well go strip for a random guy. I never would, but thats how it feels. I’m not sure if I am making sense on where i’m coming from. I just don’t know what to do with these feelings and how to get past them. I brought everything up to him and he did not really have much to say other than it was just a norm for guys to go to strip clubs for bachelors trips, which i understand this was an occasion. But it honestly doesn’t really make me feel better. How do I know in the future if we get married and he is the groom and got a lap dance, that it is rlly is “no big deal”. It just leaves such a gut wrenching feeling in my stomach, and I really don’t want this to bring our relationship down. I really want to find a way to get through this, I just can’t tell if ITA for feeling this way, or if he is because he is not necessarily making me feel like this isn’t something that is going to happen again? Please help, i need all the advice i can get.

hello, this is my first time posting and i’m not really sure what to do. This post isn’t about me but about my sibling 27F. Her and her fiancé (30M) are getting married in a week and both bridal and groom parties went on separate trips before hand. The male group had gone to a strip club and did not tell any of their significant others so they decide to keep it a secret. Most of us girls found out and were questioning our significant others about what truly happened. No one really cared as long as there were no lap dances out of respect. I recently found out the fiancé had a lap dance and still has not told his fiancé (my sibling) I am conflicted because the wedding is only a few days away now and I am the only girl aware of the lap dance. I do not know whether I should keep it a secret until after the wedding, or should i tell the groom i know and he should tell her before me, or should i just straight up tell her. I am worried if I say something before the wedding she will call it off after spending so much time and energy into planning everything, but I also want to give the groom a chance to be upfront with her before hearing it from someone else. Or am i being too dramatic and let it slide? I care about my sibling very much and feel guilty knowing what she did not want to happen happened. Someone please help.