AITA for telling my bestfriend something I'm uncomfortable with that made him leave me?
I 24F has a friend 23M n we have been friends for like 4 yrs now. We met in the first yr of our college n had our ups n downs along the way as normally friends do.But at the end of the day or after days we just come back together after apologies or whatever.
Recently I asked him how I made him feel when he's with me n he answered that I made him feel dumb, happy n a bit of a narcissist at times n I was kinda amused as well confused about it so I asked him to elaborate. He brought up an eg where I said he was being inconsiderate of my feelings n decided to choose for me when it was not needed.
The said example was something that happened in the 4th yr of my college where everyone had gone home for the festival holidays but my family didn't want me home cuz I had been recently home for a wedding just 15 days back n it was a waste of money for them to have me back at home. I was obviously hurt that my family didn't want me home for the festival but still wanted me to send them the festival appropriate customs gift for which I refused n decided not to celebrate the festival all together and stay at my hostel all alone. My mother realised later that it wasn't safe for me to stay at the hostel all alone but still didn't want me at home n started to force me to go to an uncle of mine in a near by city who doesn't exactly appreciate me. Their family is very passive aggressively insulting towards me n whenever I'm at their place I just wanna leave asap. So I knew for a fact that me being at their place was gonna ruin not only mine but their moods as well so I logically refused. But my mom didn't back down n kept insisting n brought my bestfriend into this.
He tried to insist n force me to leave as well n I refused once again explaining to him why I can't go to my uncle's. I assured him I can handle myself n I wasn't all alone n it wasn't the first time either but he didn't agree with me n decided to involve someone I strictly warned him not to. He involved my dear senior into it whom I admire a lot n she is very friendly n kind of a sister for me which I never had. I don't wanna come out as a rude person in front of her AT ALL. She has helped me pass my exams through college n I feel indebted to her that's why I knew if she got involved n tried to insist which I know she would cuz she's persistent like that I knew I wouldn't be able to refuse without coming out as rude or ungrateful. So that's why I strictly warned him not to get her involved n he just goes ahead n does EXACTLY that n I'm then forced out of my own room to leave n go to my uncle's place. I felt ashamed n humiliated n didn't talk to him for days but eventually decided to let go n forget about it.
Bringing this up I told him he is inconsiderate at times maybe have a god complex n likes to dictates others action based on his judgement n not taking into account other people's feelings.He was pretty offended by that n said he felt so hurt I called him all that n that he doesn't want me to stay with a person who forces his decision on me n makes me do things I don't wanna n decided to leave.
So AITA for my harsh comment or was it a valid situation to get upset about?