u/Dense-Collection5148

I’m a 29-year-old guy and I haven’t masturbated for a little over a week now. At first it felt manageable, but today the urge is hitting really hard.

I didn’t expect it to be this intense. My mind keeps drifting back to it, and it’s honestly getting difficult to focus on anything else. Part of me wants to stay disciplined and see how far I can go, but another part of me is saying “just give in and get it over with.”

I’m curious how others deal with this phase. Does it get easier after this point, or is this where most people struggle the most?

Right now I feel like I’m at a breaking point and I’m not sure if I’ll hold much longer. Any advice or experiences would really help. 💭

I’m a 29-year-old guy, and I’ve been stuck in this cycle since I was about 13. What started as curiosity turned into something that now feels like it has a grip on me.

I don’t feel in control anymore.

It’s not even about wanting to do it — sometimes I don’t. But I still end up going back to porn out of habit, boredom, stress… anything, really. It’s like my brain is wired to default to it. I’ve tried to stop more times than I can count, and every time I fail, it hits harder.

What scares me the most isn’t even the habit itself — it’s what it’s doing to my mind.

I’ve started to notice that the way I look at women isn’t the same as it used to be. I hate admitting that. I don’t want to see women in a distorted way, but I feel like years of this have changed something in me. Sometimes real-life interactions feel… different. Less exciting. Or I find myself comparing things in ways that I know aren’t fair or healthy.

And that makes me feel like shit.

So I guess this is why I’m posting here, especially asking women:

If you knew a guy had been dealing with something like this for years, would it change how you see him?

Is this something that can be “undone,” or do you think it permanently affects how someone connects with women?

Have you ever been with someone like this — and did you notice it?

I feel ashamed even writing this, but I’d rather hear the truth than keep pretending it’s not a problem.

I don’t want this to define me, but right now it kind of feels like it does.