Maybe I'm insane.. today I had to do some annoying task and naturally I drank 4 shots to make myself FEEL okay, horrible I know....well, I felt so sick, I threw up twice...now I can't even look at these shots...I'm just wondering if you think the "smoke a pack of cigarettes" to gross yourself out might help?...
This shit is the only comfort i have for my emotional inconveniences ...and i do mean nothingn, no emotionally supportive family.... I'm afraid to be on this any longer and i'm scared to be off it...i feel so...patient, mellow.. Can someone confirm things will make me happy again? Oh, i also haven't slept really...actually my sleep is really bad, and if i stop taking it will be worse :( can someone relate? I threw up earlier after drinking a feel free and then i noticed i had slightly brown discharge *tmi*
Cannot trust myself to taper...i always end up taking more than I need to..i'm afraid of letting this go...specifically for work and for weekend fun...please help
Im so sick of not being able to relate to anyone irl, I just want someone to vent to that understand me, understands the love and hate for this stuff..
I've had a really hard time trying to quit this stuff...I'm up to 4 extracts a day, I hate it, but the thought of starting my day without a shot...makes me so nervous, this stuff made all the inconveniences in my life not feel as bad..
I have ADHD, my family isn't close to me at all...recently went through a breakup, i've been on this stuff for 2 years...I want to leave it alone..but I FEEL LIKE I'M GOING TO MISS IT SO MUCH...to finally be able to handle things..
I've tried to taper..I failed, and cold turkey hurts...its so uncomfortable..
How can I move on knowing I wont ever feel this nice feeling again? I'm so alone..this stuff feels like a hug..what do I do with my weekends now? I used to drive on it, listening to music...man I love doing that..I have nobody in my life, and this stuff makes me feel like I don't need anybody... sorry, I just wanted to vent, I know its not what people want to hear...
I want to quit...but not badly enough...idk..I miss my healthier lifestyle, I used to be a health nut...anyways...anyone else feeling down?