I’ve been experiencing 24/7 DPDR for about five years and decided to finally focus on healing. I have a counseling appointment scheduled in a few weeks.
The issue is that I first got DPDR while dating my now wife. I told her when it first happened, but she didn’t understand (and frankly, neither did I yet, so I probably didn’t explain very well). I got a little discouraged about it all and moved on hoping it would go away. It didn’t, and I just never really brought myself to talk to anyone about it again.
I feel like I need to explain it to her to begin healing and growing. I feel like I’m living a secret life or a lie because what’s in my brain is very different than what I show to her and family.
How do I address this without giving off the thought that I’ve been fake or lying this whole time? Or that I’m not the person she thought she knew? She’s the most supportive person I know, but I have this anxiety that it will make her very upset to hear this thing I’ve hid for five years.