My whole life I assumed I was just "into mature" guys but thinking I was groomed and not mature enough myself to realize what was happening. A time came about when I was 15-16 and was talking with this guy who was like 23-25 ish, but definitely over 23. Push came to shove and I had it set in my mind I was going to flirt really heavily with him. Ended up with skype calls and explicative things on webcam and over time a few months/maybe a year, a photo in particular of myself. He worked at our local grocery store and my tech savvy teen self took it upon myself to use the internet to message him on Facebook (cringe I know; this was like 2014 lol). I kept in touch with him until I was about 20 and entered my current relationship where I no longer craved that attention because I had someone who loves me and not just my body. I am 27 now. It's been 13 years since this happened and 7 years since I stopped all contact with him, platonic or not. I feel like since I kept pushing him so I've been questioning...was I actually a victim. My family says women are seducers and will get men in trouble so I feel its my fault. I haven't been able to tell them because of their mindset of it being my fault I "tried to grow up too fast" even though my mom works in family services now, and may not be how she feels. While no physical contact ever happened with him when I was a minor, was this actually me being groomed or am I overreacting?
Edit: I have issues as an individual with Autism Spectrum Disorder already with intimacy but been looking into other avenues for why I feel so weird about intimacy. I wanted opinions of others who are in this community as a way to work through it, in case its something about it affecting me now. I am pretty stoic about the whole thing. Which kinda worries me too lol but anyway, just to hear y'alls opinions I suppose and any resources if you feel they would help me heal ❤️