From the reading I’ve done the general consensus appears to be it’s advisable to negotiate remuneration in most, but not all, cases.
I’m curious about when it’s advisable to accept a first offer and not negotiate.
What are the top reasons or circumstances in which you think it’s ill advised or unwise to attempt to negotiate a salary and simply accept an offer?
I can’t deal with the criticism anymore. Everything I seem to do is wrong. Not supportive enough, don’t help enough. I’m beyond breaking point.
I have a 10 month old son and I’ve never been less happy. I love him more than anything, he brings me so much joy, but I think my wife and I are on the verge of divorcing. I haven’t worked since he was born, half of that time was by choice, I was made redundant a week before he arrived and always planned to take around 20 weeks off. But it’s taken me a lot longer to find a job than I’d anticipated. I thought being at home would be a massive help. I take him for a few hours in the morning or afternoon, I’m around to do the house work, now that he’s on solids I can take him for longer stretches, but it’s all for nothing. I get told that my wife is basically parenting solo, has no support, is in this alone. I feel guilty about doing anything for myself, it’s almost always thrown back at me at some point “I wish I had time to do x,y,z” you don’t know what it’s like, you couldn’t do this, you have never, etc… I just can’t handle it anymore.
I’ve spent 6 months trying to get a job. Endless rejection. When I prep for interviews I feel guilty I’m not parenting. I have done uber eats deliveries just to bring some money in but invariably I get hit with “gee I wish I got to drive around all day”. I’m not perfect. I’m not faultless. But I feel like there’s this constant barrage or criticism.
Am I super dad/husband that dusts every inch of the house? Do I forget things? Could I do more? I’m sure there’s always more I could do, but I do my best and I try so hard to be supportive however I can. Im home every day trying to help. And I know she’s got a lot on her plate, and is shouldering most of the burden, and is sleep deprived, and there’s hormone changes, but I feel completely broken. I feel like I’m kicked every single day. Endlessly criticised. I feel completely worthless. Incompetent. I’m so unhappy.
I stopped drinking when he was 3 months so that I would be more present. I barely go out. I’m told “you need to socialise, spend more time with your friends, it’s good for you” but it always gets used against me down the line.
We’re doing therapy. And I am going to do individual therapy but I just can’t see a way forward. Sorry if this is an incoherent ramble. Im heightened and I just don’t know where else to express this.