This is a vent post and these are my personal opinions so please don’t be offended.
In my worldview, women should be feminine and men should be masculine. Masculinity isn’t attractive on women and vice versa. Men’s clothes don’t look good on women because they’re tailored to fit male proportions. It’s the same reason clocky trans people have that uncanny look.
If I were to detransition and live as a woman, I would have to be feminine, but this is no longer an option for me. I’ve been on T for 7 years and I have a beard and a flat chest. I’m better off continuing to live as a man because I’m too masculine to be a woman.
I like the way I look now and transitioning helped with my dysphoria. But if I could start my life over, I would suffer with the dysphoria instead and not transition even if it made me suicidal. At least then I could have the privileges that come with being a beautiful woman and still date women. I could be a femme and date other femmes.
In an ideal world tho, I’d be a straight man and get married and start a family. I don’t think homosexuality is bad but it’s not normal. I mourn the normal life I never got to live.