Okay, I’m 17, and pretty much my whole life I’ve struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts. My dad was a drug addict, and my mom was an alcoholic. Ever since I was a kid, I’ve never really wanted to be here.
I moved in with my grandparents when I was around 10. About two years ago, I left regular high school and switched to online. Around that time, I started using weed and other drugs , and I ended up losing all my friends because of it, including my first real girlfriend.
I’m not writing this to give my full life story, just to give some context about where I’m coming from.
My dad is getting out of prison soon, and I know he has ways to get pretty much any kind of drugs. Lately, I’ve been thinking about starting steroids. I just want to be muscular. I want to look better, feel more confident, and actually be happy. I honestly feel like looks are everything at this point.
I’ve tried working out for the past two years, but I struggle a lot with eating. I don’t eat enough, and I deal with what feels like a really bad eating disorder, so it’s hard to gain any muscle even when I stay consistent.
At this point, it feels like this is my last option to actually improve my life. I don’t want to feel like a loser anymore. I don’t want to feel like I’m at the bottom. I want to be at the top.
I’ve done a little research, but I still want to learn more. Right now, I’m interested in Anavar. I don’t know how many milligrams to take, and I’m not sure if it’s even the best option for me or if I’d need to take anything else with it. I’m not even sure if Anavar is a good option at all, but hopefully someone can let me know.