I'm 30 and still living at home with my parents, which I don't mind. However, I'm constantly experiencing feelings of guilt over making my own decisions. I'm a cradle Buddhist and am currently looking into other religions. My parents and family feel very strongly about Buddhism, and if I were to ever reveal that I'm looking into other religions all hell would break loose. Although I don't see what the big deal is because at the end of the day all religions help guide you to being a better person. I'm still holding a stable job, I still spend time with my family, and am still a decent person. It doesn't help that I'm probably the "most" Buddhist out of all my cousins because I attend the temple the most, and was officially initiated into the religion by the temple. So me deciding to explore another religion would condemn me to a lot of judgement and disapproval.
Another thing I feel guilty about is wanting to be single. I'm constantly guilt tripped into "finding a partner". However, if I do find a partner it won't just end at that. It'll be "what do they do for work?", "when are you having kids?", then comes all the unsolicited advice on how to raise a kid, relationship advice, dealing with in-laws, etc. I know my family just wants me to have someone to take care of me and spend life with, but I think I'm capable of taking care of myself and don't have a need for a partner.
I also feel guilty about how I spend my time. I'm the main babysitter, technology helper, party setup helper in the family while most of my other cousins just get to live their own lives. I'm expected to help and attend every single event in the family (we have a lot, probably 20+ a year) or else my mom gives me shit for it. Calling me selfish and saying that I'm not living my life right. Sometimes when I turn down babysitting requests even if I have no plans, my cousins will give me shit, saying I need to get out of the house more and guilt tripping me by using my niece/nephew's emotions as bait. "Oh so and so will be so sad."
I'm sick of feeling guilty all the time. It's consuming me. I feel like I'm no longer or never was my own person. Incapable of living life on my own terms and riddled with guilt every day for wanting to do what I think is best for myself. How do I overcome this (asides from moving out, I'm an only child and feel like I need to be there for my parents)?