Hiya,

Requesting beta feedback for The City in the Sands, the second book in a science fantasy trilogy. Ensemble cast, skyship crew, warring nations built around enslaved crystal gods, and a story that rewards readers as it goes. If you've ever loved Final Fantasy or Xenogears, you'll recognize the bones, but the tone runs closer to something like Fullmetal Alchemist or Joe Abercrombie.

This is Book 2. It needs context from Book 1, and I'm happy to help interested readers get caught up.

Main points of interest are pacing, character clarity, and whether the world-building holds together. Most of all, are you having fun? Line edits are not the focus.

Timeline: Flexible, but ideally within 4 to 6 weeks.

Content warnings: Violence, war, death, and some darker thematic material.

Excerpt:

Prologue: Lyla

Eight Years Before the Rise of the Azure Colossus – Rosewood, Aurelia

Lyla sat cross-legged on the velvet stool. She tried not to fidget while Abby, her attendant, wove copper threads through her braids. Each strand caught the lamplight like tiny flames. The new girl polished Lyla's boots with a reverence usually reserved for holy relics. Lyla, for the life of her, couldn't remember the girl's name. It had started with a K. Her half-brother had sent her. Lyla made a mental note to ask him once the parade was over.

He was always doing things like that. Sending someone when she needed help, stopping by unannounced to check on her. He even listened when she vented about Mother and Noel, which was more than either of them ever did. Mother told her to stop telling him all their secrets, but Lyla didn't see the harm because he was family. Sure, he wasn't her full brother, like Noel, but they had the same father. Half was close enough to full for her.

Noel had been upset with the new girl when she turned up that morning, but Mother had said Lyla needed a second attendant. He finally dropped it when Mother gave him a look Lyla couldn't quite read and ordered the girl to stay at the manor for the night. Lyla wanted to ask him about that later, after the parade.

It was Lyla's fourteenth parade. She had been going her whole life, and as far back as she could remember, it was her favorite time of the year.

Her mother's perfume drifted through the room: vanilla and something else, something that smelled like the desert wind just before dawn. Lyla breathed it in deep. She wanted to remember it. When everything else about today had faded, she wanted to close her eyes and summon that exact scent.

Drop a comment or DM if you're interested.