u/CynicalSc0rpi0

I don't even know where to start with this guy, this has been a year+ long ordeal. For context, we work as a specific type of engineer. I (25F) was the first ever to be hired by my company for this role and built the program myself. I had a strong relationship with many in the company due to my internship positions there during college. About a year and a half into the role, they decided to hire someone else into the role who was supposed to help me out by taking on half of my growing workload.

First of all, he (29M) is absolutely useless. I can get 8 projects done in the time it takes him to get one done. Second of all, he is insanely entitled. The first time he was OOO for a long period, his Teams autoreply referred to me as his "deputy." I'm not sure why, but he seems to think he has authority over me. Just today he asked about the project I'm currently working on, which is extremely outside of his scope of knowledge, and asked for my "lessons learned." Excuse me?? He has also stolen credit for my work and ideas in the past, which our manager is aware of.

I'm grateful that both our direct manager and our manager's boss see him for what he is and they're on my side. I refuse to do one-on-one meetings with my coworker because I have reported him to HR before and my manager is always there and does a great job mediating. I just wish this dude would be fired already.

In about a month I have to take my first overnight trip with my in-laws... It's only one night and I'm already dreading it. It's to celebrate my fiancé's brother's 21st, which is exciting and I love his siblings, but it sucks a little extra that it's the same weekend as my only sibling's birthday. I only said yes because I say no too often and don't want to cause a problem for my fiance and his family, even though he says it's totally okay I don't come. I know it would hurt him and I wouldn't want to do that to him.

It was supposed to be a full weekend trip and I managed to get it down to only one night because of my brother's birthday, thank god. We have to drive 3/4 hours to get there and then have to go to a concert for a band I find absolutely fucking mind-meltingly boring and then probably just back to wherever they are staying because his family knows 0 about having fun. How do I survive this without becoming a bitch?