My ex and I were together for almost four years, and everything was great. We did so much together we were constantly texting, updating each other about everything, and making decisions as a team. We never had any major issues; we always communicated openly and worked through anything that came up.
The past month was a bit difficult because we live in a country affected by war, but even then, we only had one or two minor misunderstandings nothing serious.
About a month to a month and a half ago, he started becoming distant. I asked him about it, and he reassured me that everything was okay. He admitted he was a bit distant but insisted that nothing was wrong between us. He was a good partner, and I was too. He could never handle seeing me sad or crying.
Then last Monday, I told him again that he felt distant and that I needed to understand what was going on. He sent me a long message saying that he was stressed and tired, apologized for making me feel this way, and asked for space to figure things out. I agreed.
Three days later, he suddenly texted me: “Hi, I hope you’re doing well. I’ve been taking space to think, and I want to be honest with you I think it’s better for us to go our separate ways. I appreciate and respect you a lot, and I wish you and your family the best. When you feel better, we can talk about it in person.”
I asked him why, and he said he no longer sees himself in the relationship and doesn’t feel the same way anymore. I asked him to call me. When he did, I told him I accepted it and wished him the best but then he started crying and quickly ended the call.
After that, it hit me how disrespectful the breakup felt. How do you throw away four years like that without even properly explaining? How do you make someone feel so worthless? We had talked about marriage and even set 2027 as a rough timeline. We were best friends. Just the day before asking for space, he sent me a reel about us going to Spain together.
I’ve accepted the breakup I know you can’t force someone to stay but I can’t understand the way he did it. Why didn’t he handle it with more care, especially knowing I’m going through a really hard time with my grandfather having cancer? Why not do it properly, with honesty and respect?
What hurts the most is that I still have his laptop, and it’s connected to his Gmail. I found out that the breakup message was written by AI he literally asked for a breakup message “without hurtful words.” That made me feel disgusted and deeply hurt.
I’m not as hurt by the breakup itself as I am by how he did it. It makes me feel like I’m grieving someone who wasn’t even real. Can someone really be this fake? Is that even possible?