Hello,
I will try and keep this short.
I 35 F have a step daughter 12 F. Have been in here life since she was 2. She is with us one week then at her moms for the other week.
We decided to start a family vacation fund, and I put the 12 year old in charge. (BIG MISTAKE/MY MISTAKE🫣). We were all contributing money, so was the step daughter. I wanted to give her some responsibility and feel part off the family I guess. She would keep me posted on how much money we had. The money was in a safe where me, step daughter and her dad knew the PIN. I went and looked and there was quite a bit off cash missing (about $500). When I confronted her about it she played dumb and said she didnt know what I was talking about. Then said the money should be there. At the point I was already very upset. Then she made a comment whats the big deal we arent going for a few years. Her dad went and talked to her and she admitted to him that she was taking money when she was going out shopping with her friends.
I am very upset not only did she steal the money, but lied and pretended she didnt do anything. Her dad asked her to apologize to me and told her she needs to pay everything back.
Now its very awkward with her and I. In my eyes I see her as a thief and someone who lies so easily. Did not have any emotion towards it - didnt seem sad, upset or guilty. More like oh whatever attitude. Her dad is upset with me - for putting her in charge off the money and also with her as he is dissappointed.
She seems very distance. When I say hello she won't even respond back.
Yesterday she had a talk with her grandma and the step daughter told her I want nothing to do with her, and I won't even talk to her. While from my perspective shes the one ignoring me.
Do I approach her or do I let her approach me? I was very involved in her life, we were very close and talk about everything and anything. Now I feel like our friendship/relationship has been damaged.
Thank you!