Noticing a Relapse
It'll be about 6 months since I have last sent anyone money. There have been moments where the urge was strong, but it ultimately went away because i've been busy with work and responsibilities. In turn, i've managed to save up a good amount of money, which I feel pretty proud about (especially with the fuel crisis going on right now).
However, yesterday I got a little "too close to the cliffside" and ended up messaging a content creator with roughly 150k followers on Insta/Tiktok. I wasn't expected any response, but she ended up replying and said she accepts paypal gifting. I've liked the message, and now am facing a dilemma on whether I should send (seems rude not to after having asked her and her replying), or not (seems like a costly habit to take on again). She's the same age as me so I also feel that it could be fun interacting with her.
I'm not feeling particularly stressed or worried, just unsure if I should loosen up a bit, or ultimately continue abstaining.