Stalked someone before our date, should I confess?
I should preface that I don’t have Instagram, so the degree of my stalking feels worse and is making me panic about whether I need to tell them before we get invested in something together. Long story short, I matched with someone on Tinder and felt very attracted to them. I’m incredibly great at cyberstalking people, which is usually one of those things I laugh at as a girl because I feel like it’s akin to playing an investigator and saves a lot of wasted time. I was able to figure out his last name pretty easily and then took that info to Instagram. I personally don’t have an instagram, but I have a ‘burner’ account that I use to stalk people every now and again (like an ex, or people from high school). Well, I tried following his Insta from this account but he declined it (rightfully so, it has 1 follower and 1 post, so it looks like a bot account lol). So I asked one of my coworkers to follow his account since she has a normal profile. Lo and behold, he let her follow him. She then was able to show me everything he posted and I could see all of his photos and stuff. I figured out who his ex was, stalked her, blah blah just the usual social media you dive down. While we were texting I casually mentioned something about my life that would hopefully get him to tell me he had an ex, which I already knew of course, because I wanted to open up about my ex a bit so we could bond a little over being in the same boat with dating. Okay fast forward to now.
We had an INSANE instant connection. I have never clicked with someone so easily and he feels the exact same way. We are basically little kids giggling and crushing hard on each other and we really want to just see where it goes. The problem is, I’m having crazy guilt of whether or not I need to tell him that I am actually lowkey crazy and stalked him before any of this. I have absolutely no interest in stalking him or crossing privacy boundaries going forward, I literally just had a little pre-date infatuation with him and now I’m freaking out that if I told him, he wouldn’t want to see where things go. So my guilt stems from this thought of I want him to have all the information about me before he makes the decision to see where things go for us. Neither of us was expecting our date to lead to this intense connection and of course we both now the potential of getting our feelings hurt if it doesn’t work out. Do I need to tell him what I did, that was he has all the info to make the decision to get involved with me?
Sorry for the long post! Thank you for reading it if you’ve stuck around to get this far. Any advice is welcome!