Today I went out with a friend I haven't seen in a year since we graduated uni and im proud of myself despite the anxiety nagging me in the back of my mind still. First I woke up with a stomach ache bc of the anxiety but didn't cancel our plans which I ruminated all day abt because we met up at 6pm. then I took a bus and a small ferry to get to where we were meeting which was like 45 mins of transit. I planned on not eating anything but we ended up going to a sushi restaurant, I accidentally ordered a sushi roll that wasn't gluten free and ate 2 pieces before I realized and ended up ordering a different roll despite worrying abt the gluten making me sick (I'm gluten intolerant and haven't eaten any in like 6 years), we then walked around for a while and then I went home the same way I got there and didn't immediately scrub my hands several times (maybe once🙈) and ate snacks with my fingers despite being downtown earlier and touching a lot of stuff and my phone.
this sounds so normal to most people but I get anxious walking to my local library bc of the what ifs so this was pretty big for me.
granted, it's now almost 2am and I'm scared to sleep but no one's perfect lmao