u/CosmicCherry12345

Trying to keep it short. Pardon typos.

Guy follows me on all social media, watches everything I do, likes a lot of it. I'm a good number of years older than him, by the way, but I look really good. Or that's what people say. He found out I was going to a certain concert and he showed up, so there I asked him if he wanted to hang out. He said sure!

We went out for a concert and basically spent 5 hours in the car talking and only a relatively small amount of time in the place. He's looking in my face and smiling the whole time. We're drinking too, and could not stop talking because we're vibing so well. He even brought the exact hard-to-find drink I mentioned as my favorite.

A week later I had to ask him what are you going to do with your weekend, he immediately fired back with two different plans, I suggested another, so we picked one. Went to the movies ,never chose one,, never went in and sat in the car and looked at each other for 8 hours while talking the whole time. He brought drinks again (that's kind of our thing, don't judge.) He even brought the last of my favorite, that he kept cold in the fridge all week, just in case I wanted it, along with something new that was my second favorite. My point in this is he's very considerate . He was opening doors for me and we walked around town and we got something to eat but mostly spent 8 hours yapping in the car and basically divulging more and more about ourselves.

Now that I asked him ( I noticed he has an initiative problem, which he admitted and said he'll work on) if he wants to do anything this weekend he has acted like I am bothering him when he has other things to do. Even though it's been 2 weeks now. , by the way he does not have a girlfriend- I have flat out asked him and I believe 100% he doesn't. If anything, he divulged he has not had tons of luck in the dating department so I really don't think he's lying about that whatsoever

I tried to find out by text if I'm going to get a "just friends" speech (believe me, I asked very delicately and cautiously after trying to figure out over these last several dates whether he's simply cautious, because he hasn't made one move beyond a hug in a month.) He replied that it's not that he's being cautious, it's that he doesn't want to pursue anything beyond friendship. BOOM! knife in my heart. And let me clarify that he didn't change in his interaction style; in fact, he says he looks forward to getting together with me and still wants to.

My question is why has he been acting completely like somebody who is smitten with me ,never looking away from my eyes for a second, smiling dreamily at me. Did I misread? Does he have severe social deficits? He's 43 by the way. I'm starting to feel like I'm gross and unattractive, the kind of girl that guys want to be friends with but nothing else. Although frankly I'm in perfect shape & called "Hot ______" by acquaintes. I wonder if he perceives me as "too old." Or do you think he's some kind of coward? I'm starting to think he's the 43 year old virgin and might be a bachelor for life