AITA for not wanting my MIL to stay at out house because my wife doesn’t know if she wants to continue this marriage …..
My wife and I have been together for over a decade and married for about 6 years. Lately she has really been unhappy and stated it had nothing to do with me.. but show me video about peaceful separations. When she talks about the future it isn’t “us” any more. The first red flag was we had discussed buying land in her home country for when we retired together to live there. Out of nowhere, she had changed it up and stated she was looking at land to buy with her uncle and her mom. I had an issue with this because of the fact that buying this property with us being married and what it would look like on our finances considering she is already paying for a home she had bought her mom a few years back. This was before a marriage with I have no issue with now.
My mother-in-law is coming into town in a couple months and it seems as if my wife is leaning more towards a separation, but she has yet to tell me this, but has subliminally hinted.
The other red flag was I was supposed to be going to the World Cup with her if we were able to get tickets to a specific country, but she has stated her dream was to take her brother and did not want to go with me. Even after she had told me if we got tickets to this country, we would go together. Her brother advised her that he would not be going to the World Cup with her if I went to on this trip because of a previous issue that we had more so him disrespecting me.
Her mom is supposed to be coming into town in a few months and her plan was for her to stay with us, but am I the asshole for not wanting her to stay at our home. I am being selfish and unreasonable because she already told her mom that she would be staying here.
My wife stated that she wanted to go to her home country and visit family on her own following after her mom stay here. I have never had an issue with my wife visiting her family on her own. She actually just did it about a month ago for a week, but she’s stating she doesn’t want me to go because she wants to spend time with her family alone & her brother will also be joining and they want to celebrate her sister‘s birthday who I’m whom I’m very close to. I had let her know that I would want to join for the birthdays celebration and not stay the whole time that she would be there so she can enjoy her family and friends. She stated that she didn’t want me to go and that was also her brother‘s plan so she could not invite me.
This is now been the tip of the iceberg for me and I don’t want anybody at my house, even though it’s our house, I have allowed her family to stay in her home multiple years at a time and never complained. Am I the asshole for now putting a boundary in place.
I feel as if I’m being used for convenience considering she doesn’t know if she wants to stay in this marriage.