So I met this guy while working.
Age differences was a bit large (I’m 27M and he’s 42M) but I was really into him. He was really nice to me and he had a great personality, also he was really handsome.
We started talking a lot and it seemed like we were really a good match. He never told me he was gay nor did I, but I almost guaranteed he was. My gay radar is not the best but still there were really some signed he was gay and perhaps could be into me.
Today he discreetly told me he’s into women. I feel devastated and pretty stupid also, I was going to ask him out…
Some clues (I know most of these are stereotypes and having one of those doesn’t guarantee you are gay at all, but connecting all the dots I really thought
- he never talked about women
- he never talked about past relationships
- he was in general very discreet and private (he reminded myself when I was in the closet)
- he was a bit awkward around people, like he had something to hide (again, me in the closet)
- he had the “gay voice”
- he was quite flamboyant
- he was into opera, arts…
- he has lots of female friends
- he had a great sense of style
- he was really groomed
- in general whenever he saw he smiled a lot to me
- he found reasons to talk to me, starting the conversation if I didn’t do it
- he remembered very small details of me and my life that I told him
I honestly feel so sad…thinking that I didn’t had a chance at all in the first place. And that I was so stupid to started dreaming of us together…
I guess it’s life but at the same time how could I do this to myself :(