Does this run deeper than inattentive ADHD?
Hey everyone,
24m, recently diagnosed with inattentive ADHD. Ever since being a child, I was feeling this profound existential emptiness whenever I'm not doing anything.
Up until now, it was basically enough to just board each train of "you're supposed to do this next".
However now, close to the end of my studies, I genuinely don't know what the point of doing anything really is. I have my own place, a good GPA, a working student job, did an internship abroad, had a romantic relationship, even was consistent at the gym for many many months.
Now that everything I thought one should do has been ticked off at least once, I find myself with zero drive.
I believe I truly never had any drive, I just always latched onto the next best thing.
Now being diagnosed with inattentive ADHD, I wonder if that might be a causal factor.
For example, the simple action of eating takes significant effort. I receive the signal "empty stomach" and my brain goes, "huh, I think we should eat something", however I never really start doing anything until about 3 hours later, when my body starts physically shaking.
For the most part, I feel like I've been purely running on will-power my entire life.
Also grew up in a restrictive environment with a narcissistic dad, but I feel like I have now mostly worked through this experience.
I already have ADHD meds (elvanse/vyvanse) at home, however since I'm pretty sick with a severe cold, I'm currently putting off starting medication until properly healthy.
Thank you for any suggestions