u/ConfidentCat5202

I became a muslim 10 years ago and never regretted my decision…. until now.

I have been in a toxic (physical, emotional, financial) marriage for years. But I stayed and tried my best to be patient. But after my husband kept cheating and meeting up with women behind my back, I reached my limit.

I went to the local masjid to ask for help, and the ladies were unable to offer any valuable advice/help, besides, “He is allowed to have more than one wife”. And when I tried to ask the imam, he downplayed the whole situation and even made it sound like I was wrong for finally standing up for myself. He sided with my husband and told him that I should be put in my place. Oh, and he said that we shouldn’t go to therapy.

I have suffered tremendously the past year. I don’t have an appetite like before. I am more anxious. I don’t sleep well. My body hurts. And during all of this, my husband doesn’t blink an eye. He prays - and then he goes on to speak with women on WhatsApp. All while saying that he still loves me.

Last night, he tried to hug me. And then he put his hands around my neck and tried to “jokingly” choke me, all while smiling at me. That was the last straw. Any residual love that I had for him died in that moment.

The part that makes me the most sad is that I felt completely unsupported by the local Muslim community. I feel like they turned their back on me - simply because the topic was too uncomfortable for them. I have found more sympathy, help and support from non-Muslims.

Because of this, I have truly debated whether I want to be Muslim anymore.

Are there any prayers that I can do to guide me back? Should I try to find another masjid? I don’t know what to do…

SAHM with no access to finances - husband controls it all. I am hoping to go back to work once my younger starts school in the fall, but I’m trying to figure out what to do in the meantime.

I don’t want to give too much detail about my situation, but he is cheating on me. In addition, he recently put has hands on me in a threatening/joking manner. He has a lot of anger/rage issues, and it has even started to affect my children.

I have called several domestic abuse locations, but many are overcapacity or have a large vetting process (and my situation isn’t dire enough, I guess). In addition, it seems like most places go by a day-by-day basis. So even if I do find a place, I may have to uproot my daughters each time. And with one in school, that would be highly disruptive for her.

I obviously cannot get a place of my own, since I don’t make any income. And I don’t have access to money for a hotel/short-term accommodation.

I just feel very lost and scared. My children’s’ safety are my priority, and I am trying my best to protect them. But it feels like the system is making it so hard to do just that.

Does anyone have any advice?